How to Win Friends and Influence People
by Dale Carnegie

If there’s only one self-help book you need to read, this is it. We mean it.

THIS IS THE BOOK.

Hustling is a complicated but rewarding experience. And everything starts from your mindset. So if you don’t have that yet inside of you, then maybe it’s time to work on your hustling technique to have things on your side going up.

In our earlier Instagram post, we mentioned Bill Gates and Warren Buffett’s favorite business book which was “Business Adventures” by John Brooks. Warren Buffett handed his own copy to Bill. Bill Gates fell in love with the book! Now it’s a must-read for all of us hustlers. But if there’s one book most billionaires and millionaires have read, it should be this book “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie.

In fact, this is Warren Buffett’s favorite book. He might have become one of the world’s richest people not because of his investing prowess but because he overcame his shyness because of this book. Without this book, he wouldn’t have had the courage to talk to clients and the general public.

In the Berkshire Hathaway office, Warren Buffett doesn’t display any diplomas. But, he proudly displays his certificate for the completion of “Dale Carnegie Course in Effective Speaking, Leadership Training, and the Art of Winning Friends and Influencing People” dated January 23 1952.

The course teachers “made you do all these crazy things to get out of ourselves”, Buffett shared in the HBO documentary Becoming Warren Buffett. But “if I hadn’t done that, my whole life would have been different”.

So what’s exactly in this book that can make you a billionaire anyway?

The book describes techniques to become an amicable person by genuinely finding things delightful from the person you are talking to. Because admit it, most people are more interested in talking about themselves than learning more about you. So for you to be likable and win friends (or clients), ask the person you’re talking to about themselves, their expertise and what they love doing. You will get their attention and they will be warmer to you. You can indirectly correct their mistakes so that it looks as if they never did a blunder. No one gets embarrassed and you end up with a win: win solution. Well, that’s just simplifying the content of the book.

You should read it. 

The beauty of this book is that the techniques described are timeless. Even when this book is quite old, you’ll still find all of the tips doable in this day and age.

This book is also full of anecdotes that we particularly love. Dale Carnegie’s writing is very simple and easy to follow. It flows naturally as if you’re just talking to a friend. It’s not exactly just about a book on making friends but about making genuine relationships work. It teaches us to move away from being shy but to become more open-minded, be better communicators, and have more productive relationships with other people.

Just in case you’re curious about the content. Here’s a rundown of the whole book.

Part 1: Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
Principle 1: Don’t criticize, condemn or complain
Principle 2: Give honest and sincere appreciation
Principle 3: Arouse in the other person an eager want

Part 2: Six Ways to Make People Like You
Principle 1: Become genuinely interested in other people
Principle 2: Smile
Principle 3: Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language
Principle 4: Be a good listener
Principle 5: Talk in terms of the other person’s interests
Principle 6: Make the other person feel important—and do it sincerely

Part 3: How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking
Principle 1: The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it
Principle 2: Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”
Principle 3: If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically
Principle 4: Begin in a friendly way
Principle 5: Get the other person saying, “yes, yes” immediately
Principle 6: Let the other person do a great deal of the talking
Principle 7: Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers
Principle 8: Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view
Principle 9: Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires
Principle 10: Appeal to the nobler motives
Principle 11: Dramatize your ideas
Principle 12: Throw down a challenge

Part 4: Be a Leader—How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Rousing Resentment
Principle 1: Begin with praise and honest appreciation
Principle 2: Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly
Principle 3: Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person
Principle 4: Ask questions instead of giving direct orders
Principle 5: Let the other person save face
Principle 6: Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”
Principle 7: Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to
Principle 8: Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct
Principle 9: Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest

It’s a quick read and doesn’t cost much. Please buy a copy instead of relying on this quick cheat sheet. Do yourself a favor and buy multiple copies so that you can give them to your friends.

Again, this has made more millionaires and billionaires than any other book. Warren Buffett approves! This might really be the best self-help book of all time!

 

Get the book here: 

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie